Saturday, December 29, 2012

The Resolution Solution for 2013


We have once again reached that time of year when we reflect on the year that has passed, think ahead of the year to come, and resolve to make an improvement in ourselves, in our lives, or even in our world.

The problem with New Years resolutions is that we only make them once a year. More often than not, we don't follow through on them and by the time December reappears, they are nothing more than a distant memory. According to a study published by The University of Scranton, Journal of Clinical Psychology, only 8% of people are successful in achieving their resolution.

The reality of the situation is that we should be examining ourselves each day and making efforts to improve not only ourselves, but our lives and the world that we live in. Each of us should work on setting sustainable goals and putting a plan in place to meet them. Even more importantly we should revisit these goals daily to see what progress has been made, and where improvement is still needed.

But I digress.

In the world of an Autism parent, resolutions are a year round thing. Whenever a new behavior surfaces, each time a therapist works with my child, and every time I attend an IEP meeting - it all comes down to making resolutions. 

Then New Years Eve rolls around and while my friends are gathering to celebrate, I will be at home with my Aiden. We'll order a pizza, bake cookies, and watch a movie or two. We'll ring in 2013 with the East Coast, at ten o'clock our time, and then off to be he will go. I am not about to destroy his routine for one night of fun.

When he's in bed, I'll scroll through my news feed on Facebook which will inevitably be littered with festive photos of my smiling pals. My friends, dressed to the nines, looking beautiful and glamorous, will be partying and having the time of their lives. I'll feel envious of the fun they are having, but only momentarily because I have learned to embrace the life I have been given. I am content being at home with my little man while everyone else is out drinking and dancing the night away.

I have learned over the last few years not only to truly appreciate the little things, but also what it is in my life that holds value and what doesn't. My friends mean the world to me and I enjoy a night out with them just as much as the next girl. BUT, I also know that this New Year is no different or any more important than the one that came before it or the one that will follow. A different calendar will hang on the wall. I might continue using 2012 when I write the date for a week or two. But overall, everything will remain as it is. The holiday doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me and I would rather spend the night with my monkey than be out celebrating.

Don't get me wrong. 

Celebrations make life exciting and for most, this is an excellent opportunity to have a good time.

I'm not opposed to New Year Resolutions. In my opinion, anytime you make the choice to try and  better yourself somehow, it's a good thing.

My point is that maybe we would be better off making that choice before or after the start of a new year. We would be better off if we measured our success by keeping tabs on our progress, every single day. It's about constantly striving to be better than you were the day before,
Set a daily reminder on your phone, to keep your goals front and center. Write them down on post-it notes and put them up in your bedroom, on a mirror, anywhere you will be sure to see them each morning. Your chances of success are much higher if you have a constant reminder. It will intensify your motivation.

If you haven't guessed yet, I have no resolution for the New Year, but I do have three that I made many months ago and one that I added last month. The following are the things that I focus on every single day and I don't see that changing anytime soon.

My Resolutions To Live By

  • Be the best Mom that I can be to AidenLove him, praise him, nurture him, and encourage him. Watch the things I say not only to him, but in front of him. Lead by example. Raise him to be an honest, hardworking, respectful man with integrity and a giving spirit. Tell him every day...every hour if possible... just how much I love him. Shower him with hugs and kisses. Make sure he knows that he can do ANYTHING that he puts his heart and his mind into. Make sure he knows how much of a blessing he is.
  • Be the best person that I can be - for myself. Be the kind of girl who handles herself with class and grace. Don't be drawn in to petty drama. Don't cuss like a sailor. Do things that make me happy and make use of my talents. Have a generous heart and a giving spirit. Be compassionate to all people and always do what I can to help them out. Smile as much as possible. Keep a positive state of mind and always keep moving forward.
  • Raise Autism Awareness & Support the ASD Community! I continue to run the page and this blog for very specific reasons. As much as I love to see our number of friends increase, it isn't a popularity contest for me. To me, it's about interacting with every person who has become a friend of our page. It's about setting misconceptions straight. It's about reaching out to those who feel alone and letting them know that they aren't. It's about new friendships, support, and lending a helping hand.
  • Help lots tons of autism families! Being able to play a small part in helping other families this year only made my desire to help grow stronger! It was a great start but next year is going to be HUGE! To Autism, With Love will focus on providing assistance, support, and resources to families in need. I am ready to launch and praying for this to be wildly successful! 

THE CHALLENGE:
Try something new in 2013 and nix the New Years resolution. Instead make a list of Resolutions to Live By. Find a way to keep them in your mind at all times. Set reminders, make notes, do whatever it takes to set yourself up for success.

CREATE YOUR LIST BY JANUARY 15, 2013
Once you have created your list, please share with us through a Facebook message or through email. We will share the lists starting in February and the one we find to be the most inspiring, will win a prize!

Happy New Year to our Army! May your children have a happy year, filled with progress! May you have a low-stress year full of love and happiness! May those who are not affected by Autism, come to understand and accept it, without pity and without fear. May 2013 be filled with blessings for you and your family!

Together, we will raise a TON of Autism Awareness in 2013. It's going to be an awesome year.Thank you all for supporting our Army in 2012.

With Love,

Amanda


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